“I can’t believe we’re still running this shit!” yelled Editor-in-Chief Elizabeth Cleary as she flung her own feces at the staff photographer and around the table during the weekly pub board meeting. “Can we get ONE good piece of journalism that isn’t riddled with bad spelling?”
She cited CNM’s intrepid sex edition as an example of good journalism pushing the limits. “It inspired the best issue we ever ran — huge black X’s on every page!” she announced as a piece of shit hit the poor unsuspecting janitor as he walked by the half-opened doorway.
“I love working here!” said the janitor.
By now, Cleary was on a rampage.
“I’ll keep throwing my own shit until President Bob Frank shuts us down!” Cleary screamed, inspired by all the attention awarded CNM by the news stations and the blogs and the word-of-mouth. “The Daily Libel will live in infamy!”
Despite the horrifying display, Libel staff members unanimously agreed that their editor’s daily walks sure are paying off.
“My thighs look really great in this photo!” said Cleary, who is single.