by John Bear
Daily Lobo
The country is teeming with throwbacks.
What is a throwback, exactly? It's one of those cute 15-year-olds rocking a 3-foot-tall blue Mohawk and wearing a studded leather jacket with an Exploited patch safety pinned to the back, all courtesy of Hot Topic.
The two-piece-and-a-biscuit band "Mates of State" is probably a couple of throwbacks of a different kind. Though the CD liner bore no photographs, they more than likely sport John Deere hats and have difficulty sitting down because of the sheer tightness of their trousers.
The ubiquitous emo punk is a good example of a throwback: waif-like, androgynous individuals with Buddy Holly glasses, Beatles hair, disgustingly tight jeans and ring collared t-shirts invariably displaying the moniker of some long-defunct little league team - go Tigers. They hang around trendy bars and start lousy bands that offer no real contribution to the great American tradition of rock 'n' roll. They basically rip off '60s mod bands and stand on stage looking tortured and dismayed.
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Forget about the neoconservatives - these people are the new anti-Christ.
But all bitterness aside, Mates of State's four-song EP "All Day" is a perfect example of a musical genre that seems to have trouble coming up with its own sound and style.
The group is proficient enough musically with lots of organs piping out catchy melodies. The problem is the glaring lack of originality. The vocals sound like John Lennon and Paul McCartney wrestling inside a helium blimp. This once again raises the unpleasantness of the tighter-than-tight jeans thing. Those drawers may be causing a shortage of testosterone production, resulting in the Castrati-like squealing that pervades the entire EP.
The first track becomes murderously unlistenable by the time the 83rd round of high-pitched "da da da's" comes rolling back around.
The melodies all sound vaguely familiar in an elevator music sort of way - old pop favorites reduced to piped-in soundtracks at drugstores, soothing the tedium that is shopping for suppositories. In fact, these two jokers may be lifting their melodies directly off of the easy listening station.
The third track, "Drop and Anchor," sounds like Elton John at his most uninspired and sports some lame piano hook repeated ad nauseam over whiny lyrics. All it was missing was lyrics by Eminem.
The fourth and final track is a cover of David Bowie's "Starman." The "da da das" are replaced with "la la las" and what sounds like computer programmed blips and bleeps that grace most of the album.
But forget the details. Please stop covering David Bowie songs. Every band in America and elsewhere seems to feel the need to include one. We all know Mr. Bowie is the man, but really, just stop it.
"Mates of State" is talented enough. The group just doesn't rock. This is music to listen to when your date broke plans to go to one of those aforementioned trendy bars leaving you in one of those "like to paint the ceiling with my brains" sort of moods.
