Agora lends a helping ear

Outside Agora’s booth during the UNM Welcome Back Days, a man, Jim Browning, is talking about to a volunteer about how his mother is in a hospice. He talks about the death of his brother and his stepfather, but that’s not his biggest concern.
“Everybody in the family has turned to me for help, literally,” he said. “I haven’t had anyone to really turn to for help.”
The volunteer listens even though she was only passing out fliers earlier. He talks for a 10 or 15 minutes and walks away, and as he does the volunteer smiles for a second. Allie Weber said that’s the feeling that comes most often when working at Agora.

“Some people just have no one to talk to,” she said. “It’s very rewarding to be that someone to talk with them.”
College can be the best time in a person’s life — that is if that person can move beyond the stressors of academic course loads, work pressures, relationship woes, and, of course, the specter of fiscal constraints.
So how does a person get past that without turning to drinking, drugs or dropping out?

Jeremy Jaramillo said Agora Crisis Center might be the answer.
“One of the biggest reasons people drop out of school is relationship issues, mental health issues, being homesick and etc.,” he said. “Agora can really help people cope with all those things.”
The goal of the center is simple, Jaramillo said.

“We just want to provide emotional support for anyone in need. That’s it,” he said.
To get that help a person simply calls Agora at any time of day and is greeted by a volunteer.
Jaramillo said callers’ subject matter ranges from bad days to suicidal worries, domestic violence or rape crisis calls.
While the content of calls varies, the purpose is the same, Jaramillo said.

“Feelings are feelings,” he said. “There are no bad or good feelings. They just are. People need to experience that.”
It’s the volunteers’ task to help the callers experience those feelings.

Weber said Agora’s goal is not to give advice to the callers — that’s not allowed — but to listen to them.
But she said dealing with the troubled lives of others can be difficult.

“It can be hard not to take people’s problems into you,” Weber said. “I mean, sometimes you’re dealing with serious life struggles.”
Another volunteer, Amanda Hurford, said the negative energy has a way of lingering.

“Some stories just make your heart break,” she said. “Some people just go through the worst stuff.”
Despite troubles related to working at the center, the two agree that Agora’s caring environment helps with the tougher calls.
“We can come together to talk about how we are feeling about calls or what calls we have an issue with,” Weber said. “We are trained to listen.”

Listening is the biggest concern at Agora. Jaramillo said that an average person gets five minutes of listening per day, which is why it’s important that the volunteers are willing to put their own beliefs aside.

“You don’t have to change your beliefs,” he said. “You just have to support someone in theirs. You have to be genuinely interested in helping other people on their terms.

If you come in as a person who wants to teach the world your attitude or your perspective, it’s not really what we want.”