Throughout Joseph Brasher’s life, he was a doer.
Over the years, his titles have included: copier/fax/printer technician at the Duke City Typewriter Shop, service manager at Firestone, chemical equipment repairman for the military, dishwasher at the Sheraton Inn, truck driver, brother, son, husband, father, grandfather. And that’s just a start.
But in 2008, he added another title to his résumé: full-time stay-at-home dad to his three sons, and caregiver to his wife, who developed muscular sclerosis.
Brasher had just stopped working as a truck driver, due to an obstacle in the form of sleep apnea that prevented him from working further. His mother-in-law offered to assist the family in any way they needed it, but she encouraged Brasher to stay at home with his wife.
“We’re not making that much money, and it’s been real hard. So I decided I wanted to go back to work,” Brasher said. “I feel like I’m disconnected from society when I’m staying at home all the time.”
But he would be approaching a career differently this time.
When Brasher’s eldest son began his college enrollment process, Brasher decided to begin taking class too, having never attended college after high school himself.
Although his son stopped pursuing a college degree, Brasher continued, was accepted into the UNM Anderson School of Management and will be graduating at the age of 55 with a bachelor’s degree in business, with concentrations in entrepreneurship and organizational leadership.
His oldest son has moved out of the house and has two children of his own, while his second son is working and living with Brasher, and his youngest son is in middle school. He said all of his family members, including his parents who are in their 80s, have encouraged him throughout his degree-earning process.
“The support is great,” Brasher said. “They’re excited that I’m graduating. That’s all I can ever ask for.”
Brasher said he foresees his new degree and future job making a large change on his life.
He currently picks his granddaughters up from school, and he may no longer be able to do that while working, he said. He also foresees the need to find an additional caregiver to assist his wife when he is unable to be at home.
Get content from The Daily Lobo delivered to your inbox
When asked how he balances all the elements of his life, Brasher chuckled.
“I don’t know. It’s kind of rough...You have to take things when they come at you,” he said. “That’s basically how I’ve done it; I just take one thing after another and try not to get overwhelmed, because it’s very easy to get overwhelmed.”
He is currently uncertain about where he will be working, but said he is particularly interested in the idea of starting his own business.
Brasher said his children and grandchildren moved him the most to pursue this degree, as a way for them to potentially be involved in his post-college life.
“I want to leave them something,” he said. “I would love to open up my own business. That way, my kids can take over, they could run the business and it could build a life for them. That’s basically what inspired me to do all this.”
He said he hopes to motivate his oldest son to return to college, as his youngest son plans on attending college after high school.
Brasher hopes he has inspired his children by going to college and finishing.
“I try to stay as happy as I possibly can, even though, sometimes, you can’t be all the time. We don’t have that many ups and downs,” he said. “My wife and I have learned to take things as they come, you know? There’s always going to be ups and downs in your life, and we faced so many already before I started school that they don’t even phase us anymore.”
While Brasher is far from the only non-traditional student at UNM, he said he wished the University wouldn’t focus so much on younger students, leaving him and others like him with a potential unfulfilling experience.
Brasher said he felt events like job fairs were geared toward younger students and, while he has asked about programs aimed at older individuals looking for work, he has not found anything in that realm.
“I feel like UNM has kind of left me out a little bit,” he said.
Brasher said he hopes administrators in the future reach out to other businesses who are looking for older employees and invite them to visit the campus or participate in job search events.
Nonetheless, Brasher feels others are fully capable of doing the things he has accomplished.
“It just takes a lot of perseverance. You’ve just got to stick to your guns, take it one day at a time, and don’t give up. It’s not as hard as you think,” he said. “It’s a lot of work, but it’s not hard.”
He tells others who are in a similar situation to never fear trying new things, no matter their situation.
“If you have a dream,” Brasher said, “go out and try to get it.”
Elizabeth Sanchez is a reporter for the Daily Lobo. She can be reached at news@dailylobo.com or on Twitter @Beth_A_Sanchez.
