The University of New Mexico’s mascot Lobo Louie bit a child in the middle of a rampage on Wednesday, March 29. Earlier that day, Lobo Louie and fellow mascot Lobo Lucy finalized their divorce which occurred after it was revealed that Lucy was involved in an affair with New Mexico State University's mascot Pistol Pete.
After hearing the news, Louie went on a bender that ended with him spending a night in jail after biting a child, according to reports. The child's father, Richard Kocks, said that Louie was "more wolf than mascot" when he and his son ran into him in downtown Albuquerque.
“My son is the biggest fan of Lobo Louie: has posters and stuffed animals of him all over his room. So, when we saw Louie out and about, of course my son was excited,” Kocks said. “I could never have predicted what would happen when my son ran up to Lobo Louie.”
Eyewitnesses reported seeing the child run up to Louie when suddenly Louie lashed out and bit the child’s arm. The Albuquerque Police Department showed up at the scene, with Louie attempting to bite several police officers.
UNM’s department of athletics refused to use their $50 million football budget to bail Louie out of jail, which head coach Peak Ed Inhighschool said was meant to be a punishment.
“Not only does he not help us win games, but now his wife is leaving him for our biggest rival,” Inhighschool said. “It’s an embarrassment to UNM sports and to me.”
Lucy said she plans to move to Las Cruces to be with Pete and change her name to Pistol Lucy. Reportedly, the UNM community has recently nicknamed her “Loosey Lucy.”
“Look, if you had been married to Louie as long as I have, you’d know why my Petey is so much better,” Lucy said. “I mean, you don’t see him going around biting people, do ya? The biting gets tiresome after a while, ya know?”
This is not the only time Louie has bitten someone: he had often used the move as a gesture to demonstrate his “alpha” status, according to Lucy.
“Louie really thought he was the ‘alpha’ in this relationship,” Lucy said. “But, ‘alphas,’ I think, can at least, you know, get it up. He could take a lesson from Pete — that isn’t just a pistol in his pants.”
Louie was unavailable for comment as he has yet to stop trying to bite multiple civilians and UNM faculty.
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“Everything is fine. Louie just needed to go on a quick vacation,” Inhighschool said. “I’m sure he will return for the next football game we win.”
Elizabeth Secor is the multimedia editor for the Daily Lobo. She can be contacted at email@example.com or on Twitter @esecor2003