by Andre van der Merwe
Daily Lobo
To be honest with you, I hate this time of year.
This is when I say goodbye to college basketball and face the long sleepless nights ahead waiting for football to start. During this time I face many delusions, cravings and mood swings that would rival even the most dependent drug addict.
I need highlight films; ones that consist of hard hits, great passes, sweet shots, powerful dunks and pure athleticism at its finest. Instead I'm stuck with highlights of home run after home run after home run with great catches that are few and far between. I do not mean any offense to baseball or baseball fans, but it's just not my sport.
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However, within the context of my knowledge of baseball I have three simple things to look for in the 2006 season:
3. The playoff failures of the Atlanta Braves - The Braves will win their division for the billionth consecutive time, and lose early in the playoff race for the billion-and-first time. If I were any of the teams in Atlanta's division I would probably pick another sport. For as long as I care to remember, Atlanta has won their division and choked on the road to the World Series, and if they can't beat any good teams come playoff time, what does that say about the rest of the guys in the National League East? I mean come on, seriously.
2. The enormous spending power of the New York Yankees - The Yankees will once again try to purchase the World Series title. When that fails, they will try to buy a player from every team that has beaten them within the past three years to feel better about the whole ordeal. True, the Yankees have won 26 World Series titles in baseball, but I'm sure if I could have paid 26 times more money for players than the other teams I could have won 26 too. Probably 27.
1. Drama, drama, drama - My last prediction for the 2006 Major League Baseball season is that it will be wackier than a reality TV show about the late Johnnie Cochran. For instance, in Barry Bonds' first game against the San Diego Padres, a fan chucked a syringe on the field next to him. The reason is, if you didn't know, Bonds has been under allegations for steroid use during a five-year period of his career. I mean, what a great game where fans are able to express their hatred toward any player that might cross their dugout.
The thing some fans - yes I'm talking to you, syringe-tosser - don't realize is that Bonds already had a Hall-of-Fame career before 1998 when he allegedly started pumping juice. As far as I know, the person who took a stab at Bonds - no pun intended - wasn't caught or charged with anything, so what does that lead me to believe? Since there were no repercussions it will just get worse. How much worse, you ask? Let me conjure up a scenario. Don Zimmer, who is rapidly approaching the age of 100, will approach a 6-foot-6-inch steroid abusing player after a controversial play. After seconds of arguing, Zimmer will take a hopeless swing at the player, appropriately nicknamed "The Juicer." But before The Juicer's retaliation can ensue, a long-time Zimmer fan will have already shot The Juicer twice.
The shooting will be only the second time someone has been shot on reality TV, but a first for MLB fans. I can't wait to see the next episode.
