Superman's kryptonite is his mentor - oh, the irony.
The Ewing Theory lives on - in Patrick Ewing's protégé, Dwight Howard. Howard isn't as great as he's hailed to be. As one of my favorite columnists, Bill Simmons, said, he's the "worst great player" in the NBA.
It's no coincidence his mentor is Ewing. Besides glistening more than a Sports Illustrated model right before a photo shoot, Howard is entirely Ewing rebirthed.
Coined by ESPN columnist Bill Simmons and his friend Dave Cirilli, the Ewing Theory suggests that Ewing's teams, both at Georgetown and with the New York Knicks in 1999, played better in his absence than when he was on the court.
The example Simmons gives is when Ewing tore his Achilles in the second game of the Eastern Conference finals. Without their star, the Knicks inexplicably took three of the next four games from the Pacers, advancing to the NBA Finals for only the second time in 26 years.
Arguably, Howard gives credence to the curse.
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After a first-round Game 5 loss to the Sixers, Howard wagged his finger at his coach, Stan Van Gundy, saying that he wasn't getting enough touches. Little did he know the Magic actually played better when he averaged fewer shots.
As if that wasn't enough, Howard dropped a bow on the Sixers' Samuel Dalembert, forcing the league to shelve him for one game, whereupon the Magic closed out the series, easily subduing Philly 114-89 in Game 6.
Then I remember Howard scoring 30 points in a Game 1 of the Eastern Conference finals against the Cavaliers. But he nearly cost the Magic the game when he fouled LeBron James - his sixth foul - and allowed him to convert a 3-point play toward the end of regulation.
It wasn't because of Howard that Orlando won that game. Rashard Lewis bailed Howard out by hitting a clutch, fall-away trey with seconds remaining, elevating the Magic to a 104-103 victory.
And even though he had 40 points in a series-clinching win on Saturday, Howard doesn't score because he's necessarily dominant. He's the benefactor of the Duke Blue Devil Blueprint - a mediocre big man, surrounded by great shooters. Howard isn't consistently awesome. He's prone to no-shows. Yes, he's only 23, but do you think Shaq wilted under the luminosity of prime-time lights? Nope.
For the series, Orlando shot 46 percent beyond the arc. They nailed 41 percent of their long-ranged bombs in Game 6. They tied a NBA record with 62 3-pointers, the most in a six-game series.
Collectively, the Magic play outside-in, not inside-out ball. Dwight's not Denzel in "Inside Man." He borrowed Shaq's Superman cape, but the S on the chest stands for "soft."
Howard, even with his barrel chest and broad shoulders, doesn't strike fear in me, so how would he intimidate Lamar Odom, who gutted through a six-game series against Denver with a bad back? Odom was practically paraplegic. Unless Howard suddenly loses his coddled, teddy-bear persona and pinches in a little Kevin Garnett nastiness, the Magic are doomed to lose to the Lakers in five games.
In order for Orlando to win, Mickey Mouse must be the only charismatic, affable figure in Florida. We'll see who's softer after this series is over: Pau "Jeffrey the Giraffe" Gasol or Howard.
