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4/1_bus

The 66 bus came at 3:15 p.m. just like it does every day but Joe Everyman missed it by five seconds. “Seriously? Now I have to wait for the next one?” griped Everyman. #firstworldproblems #dafuq

New York gallery vies for mediocre sculptor

Student molds promising future out of essentially nothing

culture@dailylibel.com

Upon receiving the résumé of UNM sculpture student Fernanda Montoya, an art gallery in New York immediately contacted her to offer her a position Thursday.

“A BFA in sculpture? I mean, how wonderful is that?” the gallery owner said in a phone interview Thursday. “I’m sure every gallery is fighting over her, but I hope she recognizes our interdisciplinary and multi-ethnic approach to the visual world.”

Noting Montoya’s knowledge not only of Photoshop, but also her proficiency with Facebook and Kickstarter, the gallery owner said he couldn’t believe such a candidate just landed on his doorstep.

“She even files paperwork for her on-campus art museum,” the owner said with amazement. “A candidate of such matchless caliber only appears once a lifetime.”

Montoya was reportedly too swamped with job offers to return calls to the Daily Libel, but the offers were confirmed by her best friend Priscilla.

“When Fernie first told me she was majoring in sculpture, I kicked myself for not thinking of it first,” Priscilla said. “But obviously she’s earned it in those once-weekly studio classes, so I’m happy for her.”

Priscilla said she hasn’t yet received any job offers regarding her nuclear engineering major and business management minor, but she’s still hopeful that people haven’t dismissed her degree as worthless.

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